The Sofa Store,
Walking down the main street of wick was a small 12 inch high lepoard he was wearing a green jumper, blue trousers, a shiney pink jackey, a human sized glove on his head and a peace symbol around his neck, he was half way down the street when he came across a shop that sold sofas, There was a massive sign in the window that said half of for anyone over the age of 90, he though "well im 89 i could pass as 90" so he went up to the clerk who was a 6 foot tall giraff wearing a kilt and a balaclava, the lepoard squinted at the giraff and the giraff squinted at the leporad the said in unisun "What the f*ck are you?" the lepoard says "aren't you supposed to be a human" and the giraff said "well i was once but i met this man at the bingo that said that for a tenner he could turn me into any animal i wanted, so without thinking about the consequences i siad "ok i wanna be a giraff" and then poof i was a giraff i was so amazed I started running about when i got back to where the man was he was gone i though oh shi*t how will i get back to being a human, and then i noticed that the tenner was still on the table so it was a win win situation. The lepoard look at him like he wanted to say nigga is yo crazy?, then said "that still does'nt explain how you came to get a job in a sofa store or why you're wearing that ridiculos get-up". Well that was the hard part everybody took some convinsing that i was me, i was about to get ran out of town when i had an ingeneous idea. I decided to break into my house, go into my wardrobe and get out last years halloween costume, so i got it and went into the back garden and put it on, which by the way wasn't an easy task without any apposable thumbs, i put it on and started dancing a dance that i had done at the same halloween party i had worn the costume to, my wife looked out the window and realised it was me, "so i wear this ridiculos get - up as you so bluntly put it so people know its me. The lepoard looked at the giraff and said "i only came in to buy a sofa at half price and i have just had the single most wierdest day of my life" and i hope by reading this story you have too!
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