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okay. so columbus day weekend.
 drove out to the lake saturday with some family and took our 24' crownline.
  we played all day. chilled. spent alot of time on the tubes. then pulled the boat out at dark.
  at the state park we were at you are not allowed to have campfires so i sat around roasting my marshmellows over candles.
  sunday we hit the wake at dawn, when the water is glass. and i got some great fly time in. the wake was perfect and the pops went nicely. i even tried switch. landed me in the gutter a few times cuz i was pretty overconfident...but who says thats a bad thing?


Published On: 10/15/2008
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So this last week i've been skating a lot, its been pretty sweet.  i also worked a lot last week too. I'm also going to school full time at a community college with all the other bright and shining stars of america. hectic schedule to say the least. that said i'm not working at all this week, so i'm planning on dedicating myself entirely to the hobby/sport/lifestyle we all love and share. 
 
Last week i sustained a really bad bruise on my knee and a stretched/torn ligament in my wrist.  i did this by doing a simple rock to fakie down a 3 foot spine and getting my wheels caught in a near by ramp at the base of the spine.  my knee cap and palm hit ground first stretching my wrist in an upward motion and making me clinch it then lying there for a minute because my knee hurt to bad to get up. after making a scene which i hate to do i skated around doing little lip tricks and shoves until i left roughly 30 min later.  it sucked.  

i tried to upload a picture of my knee but this f*cking website wont load any of my pics which is bullshi*t.  

moving onward i'm really starting to pick up on flip tricks.  i'm not much of a switch skater.  all i can do is switch shove, switch shove rewinds and switch front shoves. weak i know.  anyways i'm  really close to hardflips and yesterday i landed a fs and bs bigspin.  it was really sweet.

minnesota has a really great skate scene.  lots of kids and plenty of old timers.  its to the point where there's a bit of symmetry between skaters. and by that i mean that they all get a long (for the most part) and kinda act like they know each other.  this goes for majority of the parks i've been to.  i've been skating at new hope, mn park a lot lately.  really small.  too small. great practice park though.  3 different sized boxes, a bench, 1 rail but i hate rails so thats fine by me.  couple more things (quarterpipes, fun box, hubba, stairs, and etc.)  its not perfect.  it has a couple big flaws but what do you expect when a skatepark is built by a city council of rule donning adults who just build because of pressure from the citizens.  if you've never stood on a board you shouldnt have any say in its parks.  

i think more places should try to emulate the skate plaza idea.  its more expensive but ramp companies are ridiculous too. i think a skate plaza is nicer looking, better for skating, be less upkeep and would keep more skaters off the streets than a cookie cutter skatepark that looks like one from the next town.  

anyways that was a huge blog post.  

until next time
the mnlocal


Published On: 9/22/2008
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Something happened to me that made me feel reborn. And it couldn't have happened at a better time, because it happened just before I moved out this week. If I could just get a job I'd enjoy, my life would be all right. I know who I am, what I want, what I'm doing and what I've done. If I could snag a good boyfriend my life would be perfect... at least as perfect as it can possibly be at the moment.

Published On: 9/6/2008
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The Superman Mythos

by Thyroros

The term superman first entered into modern usage through the writings of Friedrich Nietzsche. This late nineteenth-century German philosopher was vehemently anti-Christian and never tired of condemning the faith as weak, absurd, even detrimental to human development. While Hitler admired him, and the Nazis are said to have made use of some of his ideas, Nietzsche did not actually share their racist and anti-Semitic views. (1) Thus it is not entirely incongruous that two young Jewish men from Cleveland, Ohio would have adopted the term for their own use. While many assume Superman is merely a work of science fiction, I do not believe this to be the case. I too grew up amid all the movies (the first film starring Christopher Reeve came out the year after I was born), cartoons, and TV shows, believing the Man of Steel to be nothing more than a slightly stale and out-dated comic book hero. However, after watching various episodes of Smallville, a very different interpretation of the American icon began to impress itself upon me.

As nonsensical or offensive as some people might think this to be, the tale of Superman represents an allegory of another well-known supernatural, extra-terrestrial being: Satan.

Before delving into some of the more specific correlations, and often glaring similarities, between these two legendary immortals, there is an important point which needs to be made regarding the nature of angels. Angels are extra-dimensional and other-worldly travellers who make infrequent appearances throughout the Bible and other related texts. They usually do not have wings, and they almost always appear just like men. The Seraphim and Cherubim are the only two celestial orders consistently described in the Bible which bear wings. While most angeaologies consider both orders to be angels, the highest orders in fact, neither the Old nor New Testaments refer to them as such. But this is really just a semantic argument that needn't be fully addressed here. Anyway, the English word angel is derived from the Greek angelos which simply means messenger, as does the Hebrew mal'ach, which is used in the Torah, the prophets, and other Hebrew writings. (2) These terms can be used to indicate human or divine beings. Many times the humans with whom angels communicate are not even aware of it until the supernatural visitors perform some act obviously beyond the capability of mere mortals. After closely examining all the Biblical references, I was forced to conclude that there is no overwhelming distinction between angels and what modern mythology refers to as aliens. Both are extra-terrestrial, and both seem to exhibit powers and/or technology beyond what might traditionally be considered human. Now, Satan, if standard Christian doctrine is correct, is a fallen angel, while Kal-El, or Superman, is a stranded, immigrant alien.

Objections may arise as angels are said to dwell in heaven while aliens inhabit the supposedly innumerable worlds located in the vast reaches of space. But again, the only difference between the concepts of heaven and space lie in the minds of people who refuse to acknowledge the simple facts. Both exist above and outside the earth, and both are impossible to visit for the majority of living human beings on this planet. Even now, after thirty-some years of manned space-flight, it still requires the pinnacle of human technology, and the availability of monumental resources, to even consider such undertakings. We haven't been to the moon in over thirty years according to official sources. Moreover, space remains extremely dangerous. It is a notoriously hostile environment; the slightest mistake or malfunction can bring about instantaneous death for even the most well-trained astronaut. So, heavenly realms and intergalactic space, not that different, right? Okay then, hopefully that matter is settled, and we can move on to Krypton.

As most of us know, Kal-El's homeworld, Krypton, was completely obliterated due to a nuclear reaction at its core, which resulted in the infant Kryptonian's emergency flight to earth. Now, some theorize that the asteroid belt in our solar system was created when a large, terrestrial planet located between Mars and Jupiter (often referred to as Astera/Astara) exploded some time in the past. (3) It's possible that this same cataclysm was also responsible for the destruction of the Red Planet's atmosphere and its civilization. Satan may also be connected with Mars and Astera, depending on one's interpretation of certain Old Testament books such as Ezekiel. Ezekiel states in chapter 28, verse 14 that the former anointed cherub, Satan, "walked up and down in the midst of the stones of fire". It's not a very far stretch of the imagination to connect "the stones of fire" with planets. Please examine the following verses for more details:

Ezekiel 28:15-17 15 Thou wast perfect in thy ways from the day that thou wast created, till iniquity was found in thee. 16 By the multitude of thy merchandise they have filled the midst of thee with violence, and thou hast sinned: therefore I will cast thee as profane out of the mountain of God: and I will destroy thee, O covering cherub, from the midst of the stones of fire. 17 Thine heart was lifted up because of thy beauty, thou hast corrupted thy wisdom by reason of thy brightness: I will cast thee to the ground (Hebrew 'eretz is also often translated as land or earth), I will lay thee before kings, that they may behold thee.

So Satan may have ruled a physical civilization spanning Mars, Astara, and perhaps several moons as well. But he rebelled against his God and King, and was cast to the earth along with a third of the Heavenly Host (See Revelation 12:4).

The aforementioned information thus allows us to have a much clearer understanding of the scenario presented in Smallville 1961. While I don't disagree with Chloe about the possibility of genetic memory being stored in the DNA, I don't accept that this was necessarily true in Clark’s case. I believe it to be more likely that Jor-El and Kal-El are one person, not father and son. Here's how it works:

I. Jor-El is Satan. II. The father who exiled Jor-El/Satan to earth is actually the Father, as in Yahweh, the God of the Bible. III. Jor-El/Satan returns to space to continue the "War in Heaven" (See Revelation 12:7).. IV. In order to eventually assume the role of Anti-Christ, Satan devises a seemingly foolproof plan. Just as Yahweh/God limited himself in power when He assumed the form of Jesus/the Christ, Satan formulates a a similar device. He clones himself and denies this clone access to certain segments of his memory and powers. This way he will more easily deceive humans into believing that he is a righteous savior rather than evil incarnate. But he makes messages and recordings beforehand which will remind him of certain things at planned intervals. This will enable him to develop in the most ideal way in order to fit the role of the Christ more perfectly. V. Satan and his angels are defeated in the heavenly realms, Mars and Astera/Krypton is destroyed as a result. Satan transfers his consciousness/spirit from Jor-El to the infant clone, Kal-El and rockets off toward earth.

As additional support for this concept, let us explore the meanings of the principal character's names belonging to the Superman mythos:

Clark - Old English - Clergyman or learned man (4)

Kent - Welsh - Bright white, white or bright (5). Another interesting possible derivation of this name is from the Biblical Kenites (first mentioned in Genesis 15:19 as enemies of Israel), who may have been descended from Cain (for in Hebrew Cain is more accurately transliterated as Qayin, and Kenites as Qayini. Adding an "i" to the end of a name in Hebrew indicates the people or descendants of that personage. Israel/Israeli, Qayin/Qayini. See the pattern?) (6)

Kal-El - Can be translated as destruction or completion of God in Hebrew (or possibly 'all that is God/totality of God'). (7) El is the Hebrew word for God.*

Jor-El - J is actually pronounced Y (the letter Yod) in Hebrew. Possible translations are: Yare'-el - fear of God, Yarah-El - God teaches, taught of God, Yeru-El - God is a foundation, Yeri-El - founded of God; God will see. (8)

Krypton/Kryptonite - From the Greek words krypto - To hide; kryptos - hidden unseen, secret; krypte - hidden place (9)

Lex - Latin for law (Just in case 'Lex' is actually short for Alexander, Alexander is Greek for leader of men, alex (leader) + ander (men).10

Luthor (Luther) - Teutonic- famous warrior/ famous in war

Old German - Warring ones

German - warrior/famous people?. Martin Luther was a Catholic monk and theologian turned Protestant reformer (1483-1546). (11)

*If one is inclined to doubt that Kal-El and Jor-El may actually be Hebrew names, allow me to you remind you that both Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster, the original creators of Superman, were Jewish. Maybe I'm wrong, but I think it's highly unlikely they would give their characters Hebrew-sounding names by pure chance. (12)

There are just a few more items of interest which may possibly be connections between Kal-El and the Red Dragon/Satan. Since Superman derives his powers from the sun, that would make him a kind of 'sun god'. Satan has sometimes been compared with the sun gods of ancient mythology such as the Egyptian Ra, the Greek/Roman Apollo and the Persian Mithra. The 'infinity serpent' burned onto Clark's chest in the second season finale of Smallville is another fascinating correlation, as Satan is often recognized as being or controlling the serpent in the Garden of Eden (Genesis chapter 3), and one of his titles in Revelation (12:9) is that "that old serpent". Finally, it would be quite simple to draw a pentagram inside the five-pointed shield emblazoned on Superman's costume. Pentagrams are used in ceremonial magic and Satanism the world over. Not that such a detail is conclusive, but I just thought I'd include it for the sake of being thorough.

So what does all of this mean? The reader, of course, is free to draw his or her own conclusions But here's what I believe; Superman comics, movies, and TV shows (and everything else in between) are Satanic Propaganda. Superman is the Anti-Christ/Satan and Lex Luthor, representing Christianity, is desperately trying to defend the earth against him. As the story is told from Satan's perspective, Lex is falsely demonized and portrayed as an insane criminal. In the words of Friedrich Nietzsche from Thus Spake Zarathustra, "God is dead. I teach you the superman." This is the lie that the father of lies is eager for us all to swallow down between mouthfuls of French fries and jelly-filled breakfast pastries.

- Thyroros, December 2, 2003, Redlands, CA.

Endnotes:

1. See Friedrich Nietzsche's Biography.com
2. Information gathered by using the King James Bible (1611 Authorized Version) and The Strongest Strong's Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible. James Strong, L.L.D., S.T.D. Fully Revised and Corrected by John R. Kohlenberger III and James A. Swanson. Grand Rapids Michigan. Zondervan. 2001
3. Click here for the standard line on the Asteroid Belt formation. Go here for more information on the possible link between Mars, Astara, and Satan, maybe even Venus?
4. Name definition for Clark (Any standard name/baby-name book should provide this information.)
5. Name meanings & Name origins (Any standard name/baby-name book should provide this information.)
6. See footnote 2. Most Biblical scholars don't make the connection between Cain and the Kenites. This is probably due to the long-held view that the Flood of Noah/The Great Deluge (as related in Genesis chapters 6-8) was worldwide and no one survived except Noah and his family. However, a gr owing number dispute that the Flood was regional rather than global (which is possible based on certain interpretations of the passages in Genesis), and therefore, Cain's progeny could have survived.
7. From the Strong's Concordance Hebrew Dictionary (contained within the same volume), Reference numbers 3605-3607, 3615-3617
8. From the Strong's Concordance Hebrew Dictionary (contained within the same volume), Reference numbers 3372, 3384, 3385, 3400. Incidentally, yerah is the Hebrew word for moon, ref. 3391.
9. From the Strong's Concordance Greek Dictionary (contained within the same volume), Reference numbers 2926-2928 10. (Any competent Latin-English and Greek-English dictionaries can be used to find these definitions. Also standard name/baby-name book should provide this information.) Here's a couple of websites just in case you want them. For Alexander. For Lex & another for Lex. Just for fun, here's website containing excerpts of Plutarch's Alexander the Great (who was not a good guy) bio.
11. "Luthor/Luther" name meaning.
12. "Jews are the true comic book heroes", article from the Chicago Sun Times and here's a History of Superman article from Superman.com.ar in case your interested.

End the words of Thyroros.

This article can be found at: http://www.supermanhomepage.com/comics/comics.php?topic=articles/superman-satan



Published On: 4/29/2008
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       In order to form a more perfect kiss, enable the mighty hug to promote
to whom we please but one kiss.

      
      
Article 1 : Statement of Love: The Kiss
      
1. Kiss on the hand.... I adore you
       2. Kiss on the cheek... I just want to be friends
       3. Kiss on the neck... I want you
       4. Kiss on the lips... I love you
       5. Kiss on the ears... I am just playing (i hate that)
       6. Kiss anywhere else ... lets not get carried away
       7. Look in your eyes ... kiss me
       8. Playing with your hair... I can't live without you
       9. Hand on your waist... I love you to much to let you go

      
      
Article 2: The Three Steps
      
1. Girls: If any guys gets fresh with you, slap him
       2. Guys: If any girl slaps you, her intentions are still good
 ! ;! ; ! !      3. Guy and Girls: Close your eyes when kissing, it is rude to stare

      
      
Article 3: The Commandments
      
1. Thou shall not squeeze to hard.
       2. Thou shall not ask for a kiss, just give one or take one.
       3. Thou shall kiss at every opportunity.
 
      
    Article 4: How to French Kiss
            Here's How:
  1. Set the scene. Make sure that the mood and time are right.
  2. Relax! Take a deep breath and let go of any tension in your neck and shoulders.
  3. Put your arms around the person you want to kiss.
  4. Start off with a normal kiss, not too firm, not too aggressive. Closing your eyes is optional.
  5. In mid kiss, gently open your mouth and softly nudge the other persons mouth open using your tongue.
  6. Again, not too aggressively, move your tongue inside the other persons mouth and playfully touch their tounge.
  7. Read the other persons body language, if they seem tense or start to pull away, stop what you are doing.
  8. If they open their mouth more or otherwise indicate they like the kiss, keep on doing what you have been only with a little more passion.
  9. As the kissing gets going saliva build up can be a problem, don't forget to swallow.
  10. Make sure you keep your tongues relaxed but your lips tight (saliva again), you don't want the kiss to turn messy.

Tips:
  1. Don't forget to breathe.
  2. Since French Kissing is "wetter" than other kinds of kissing it is a good idea to start with dry lips, don't lick them first.
  3. If one of you have braces you can still French Kiss, you just have to be more careful and not as forceful when things get passionate.
  4. If both of you wear braces you can still French Kiss, you just have to be very gentle and avoid touching teeth.
  5. French Kissing takes practice, but at least it is fun to practice this one!


 
       **Remember**
      
A peach is a peach
       A plum is a plum,
       A kiss isn't a kiss without some tongue
       so open up your mouth,
       close your eyes,
       and give your tongue some exercise!!!


      
      
      
WELL here's a few reasons why guys like girls...
   
1. They will always smell good even if its just shampoo
       2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder
       3. How cute they look when they sleep
       4. the ease in which they fit into our arms
       5. the way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world
       6. How cute they are when they eat
       7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end makes it all worth while
       8. because they are always warm even when its minus 30 out side
       9. the way they look good no matter what they wear
       10. the way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful thing on this earth
       11. How cute they are when they argue
       12. the way her hand always finds yours
       13. the way they smile
       14. the way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight
       15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later you will be arguing about something
       16. the way they kiss when you do something nice for them
       17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you'
       18. Actually ... ! ! ju! ! st the way they kiss you...
       19. the way they fall into your arms when they cry
       20. then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly
       21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt
       22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt . (even though we don't admit it)!
       23. the way they say "I miss you"
       24. the way you miss them
       25. the way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore.....Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them ... it matters not.   Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound,you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart.  We love them for a million reasons, No paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of theheart.


Published On: 4/1/2008
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Published On: 3/29/2008
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I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so, I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
And the reason is you
And the reason is you
And the reason is you
I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you 


Published On: 3/28/2008
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Skateboarding to me is pretty much everything. Honestly, It's everything. Because skating is something you can do when you're in a good mood, pissed off, or whatever. It relaxes you and calms you down, but at the same time, you're focused and energized. No matter whats going on in your life, you can always just skate. It's kinda one of those things that can make a perfect day better. (Or make a crappy day better) But there's so many different ways to ride. You can skate by yourself, with a big group of friends, or just head to a local skatepark and ride with whoever. So, no matter what your style of skating is; street, park, vert, goofy, regular, or however you choose to do it, just skate.


Published On: 3/22/2008
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D.O.P.E. is coming!!!!
DEATH OR PRISON EVENTUALLY!!!!!
A true story about the greats of Skating
Bruce Logan World Champion 1975 76
Dogtowns Jay Adams maybe the skater who revolusionised skateboarding
Dennis Martinez world Chmapion
Christian Hosoi the skate star of the 80s
D.O.P.E. tracks the Rise and Fall and Redemption of Four major skateboard legends.
Stunning archival footage and current HD interviews take you on a rollercoaster ride through heaven and hell, where the highs of championship trophies are followed by the lows of addiction,homelessness,prison and death. Original music by Grammy winners ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT, P.O.D> and SWITCHFOOT along with some exciting new musical groups is perfectly married with the gritty narration of famed actor DANNY TREJO. The Rise is steep the fall is brutal and the Redemption nothing less than miraculous.
 
Nobody"s going to get up for popcorn during this film; I coudn't turn away for a second.
WATCH IT
-Actor Danny Trejo
 
D.O.P.E is DogTown with a message. I've skated all my life, and write this with a broken wrist from skating. This film is all about brokenness, but so much more, this film is about redemption!!!
 
-Jim Moriarty, CEO Surfrider Foundation
 
Everyone pretty much knows that drugs wreck LIVES, but somehow the message doesn't seem to hit home enough to stop people from doin' 'em D.O.P.E. delivers the point with both barrels. With unflinching cander and unfeigned grit, the amazing story of one of skateboarding's founding legends; Dennis Martinez speaks with authority that transcends wards of power that will change lives.
 
-Skateboarding Legend Rodney Mullen
 
This movie shows how any person at the top of their game can be taken over by the uncontrolled power of drugs and be changed forever. You can only ride the edge so far before you FALL.
 
-Professional Skateboarder, 6 times X Games Champion Bucky Lasek
 
A Fascinating glimpse into the rise , fall and redemption of some of the world's greatest
- Michael Brooke, Publisher, Concrete Wave
 
In sharing this with you all I feel is blessed to be a part of this.
Like last year
Myself and Dennis Martinez are going to be going into the schools in the Cayman Islands to share this message and then on the 31st May 2008 we will be showing the movie in one of the local Cinemas.
Being in Law Enforcemnet I have had first hand experience seeing people make the wrong decision to get involved in drugs. I have seen families torn appart, people die because of drugs, do time, and suffer illnesses which have lead also to eventuall death.
 
Dennis Martinez is someone who has lived it at the top earning over $40,000.00US per month in the 1970's, he had alll sponsorships, shoes, boards, cars all the trimmings being the top dog in skating, he then threw it all away for drugs. Imagine  he pawned for $500.00US  of DOPE his pride and joy his WORLD CUP which he set his eyes on from the age of 12 years old. He lived on the streets saw his freinds die, robbed for a living to also feed his drug habit. He did time in prison; then something changed he now has a life he is a tireless worker for the better. He now pasters to CAT 4 prisoners he shares his experience so others do not make the same mistakes he and others made. I advise all to watch this movie as their are lessons to be learned by all
if you use drugs think about what help is out there seek it and get off it and if you know people do the right thing as a freind help them. THE LIFE YOU SAVE MIGHT BE YOUR OWN.
If you come to the Cayman Islands to skate BLACK PEARL you can say hi cause I will be there. a skater and PROUD FARTHER of
Brian 16
Sean 7
Juliana 2 she also skates
They skate and can be seen at Black Pearl
 
 
Steve Myers
Royal Cayman Islands Police Service
 


Published On: 3/6/2008
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even if we ever seperated i still wana be ur friend

but if i was ur girl im commited 2 the end

breakin tht promise, should be considered a sin

i know no ones perfect but ur as Perfect as anyone can be

and if theres one thing i know its tht UR THE PERFECT ONE 4 ME

hope thts a sight tht u can see

did u jus loose ur breath

tht means u jus had a epiphany

and u knew tht u and me was a course set destiny

i should put a beat on this and change it into a song

my heart is dedicated to u, its been here all along
 
xoxo-brianne


Published On: 2/8/2008
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All my life I had built up a fantasy
of the perfect man.
Countless romance stories and fables
helped make that fantasy a reality in my mind.
Searching for that fantasy lead to many
disappointments.
Reality made it clear that there was no such man.
And as the years went by, the fantasy started
to fade away - until I met you.
I had almost given up on the fantasy until
my fantasy became reality,
that reality became you.

Published On: 1/24/2008
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hey...
so after lookin at a load of different stuff on the net
I can see that openin one isnt gonna be easy...
any advice would be good...



WHAT'S YOUR PERFECT SKATE PARK?



Published On: 1/24/2008
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My Blog: Fantasy
By: jay_loves_ya


 

All my life I had built up a fantasy
of the perfect man.
Countless romance stories and fables
helped make that fantasy a reality in my mind.
Searching for that fantasy lead to many
disappointments.
Reality made it clear that there was no such man.
And as the years went by, the fantasy started
to fade away - until I met you.
I had almost given up on the fantasy until
my fantasy became reality,
that reality became you



Published On: 1/22/2008
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UNTIL THE DAY I DIE
story of the year


Until the day I die
I'll spill my heart for you, for you
Until the day I die
I'll spill my heart for you


As years go by
I race the clock with you
But if you died right now
You know that I'd die to
I'd die too
You remind me of the times
When I knew who I was (I was)
But still the second hand will catch us
Like it always does


We'll make the same mistakes
I'll take the fall for you
I hope you need this now
Cause I know I still do


Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you


Should I bite my tongue?
Until blood soaks my shirt
We'll never fall apart
Tell me why this hurts so much
My hands are at your throat
And I think I hate you
But still we'll say, "remember when"
Just like we always do
Just like we always do


Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you


Yeah I'd spill my heart!!!
Yeah I'd spill my heart for you!!!


My hands are at your throat
And I think I hate you
We made the same mistakes
Mistakes like friends do


My hands are at your throat
And I think I hate you
We made the same mistakes
Made the same mistakes


Until the day I die
I'll spill my heart for you, for you


Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you, for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
Until the day I die!!!


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music...AMANDA...music
never forgotten
...The only friend I really had...
...You were my HERO...
...The only one that took care of me...
...When I really needed someone...
...You were my ANGEL...
...You saved my life...
...Countless of times...
...But now you're gone somewhere else...
...And if you see this...
...I wanna tell you that...
...You are NEVER forgotten...
...For every night I prayed...
...That you'll come and see me...
...Once again...
...So I can tell you...
...My LAST goodbye...


Published On: 1/18/2008
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 2>you don't know how lucky you are.. you're throwing it all away and you act pathetic i don't know who you've become....
 
 
im sick of this bullshi*t

and its not just that
goodness gracious
its EVERYTHING!
 
No one will never find their perfect "person" or what you idealize in your mind.



Its no such thing and I am not saying just this because I am mad..





there are only two choices:


Married and bored or Single and lonely.



thats wat i've came to the conclusion of ...

xoxo-brianne
 
 
ps. i stay online b/c i want u talk to me ..if im not saying anything or u see me && i see you just say Hey


Published On: 1/8/2008
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 Babecakes lets be RANDOM
I just feel... feel like:

-Changing everything ??
-Having everything go perfectly ?
-Sharing my newly updated secrets with u ?
- i'll leave that up to u to fill out this one
-making u come back to me ???


              <3  [nope]
 
 
have u ever felt rushed ? like theres no room to breathe
 
 
My tears are steady falling, I can't stop make em' stop.
I keep falling deeper baby.
I ain't been the same since ya left with my heart.

One minute it was good the next it was bad.
I wonder what happened to what we had.
 
 
Why does it seem like u don't give a damn about me anymore?  && thanks for not listening 2 me u totally helped me out when i needed  to tell u all the shi*t thats been going  on w/ me and wats been up
 
              damn i must be trippin ?       ----    >        : ' (
 
must of my blog titles are song titles just thought id let u know [this in my fav]
 
xoxo- brianne


Published On: 1/5/2008
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Randomness here and there

Wish I could see through
See deep into you
And know what you're thinking now
 
You play it so cool
 
 
Something id thought id bring up
 
 I wish I could just break this psychological barrier... Tear it down in a blaze of beauty and trauma. Time's set still always waiting for them to make the first move, but is it true or just an act of friendliness? "Please just trust me.", the heart screams. "But what if it all comes crashing down...", the mind shoots back...
But I guess that is the definition of being human, were not perfect. Were not all civil... were not all breathtaking. Maybe that's why I've been caged for the past 18 years, I'm trying to be something that I'm not. Shielding myself from everything that could go wrong. Just play the game son...
Everything is just so high upon itself right now... I just feel... feel like:


-Changing everything
-Having everything go perfectly
-Sharing wildest dreams with a stranger and contently listening...
-Staring at the stars admiring the vast probabilities that brought this all here, and then the probabilities that brought me to that thought.
-Altering the course of someone's life in a mere instant.

My whole life it repeats over and over, what incentive can I possibly have for things to change in the future?

xoxo- brianne


Published On: 1/4/2008
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I need friends!!!!!!! Ya'll should add me or sumthing!!!! I need sumthing to do wen i get on here!!!! Thanks a bunch! <3 PEACE!<3



Published On: 12/29/2007
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 am at school, in my fourth block typing this letter to you.... I finished my exam and I am exhausted wanting to go to bed.... Really and truly I am tired. As I was on my way to my fourth block I ran into Gage and I said hello but he seemed to have ignored me. Maybe I'm doing something wrong, maybe i'm not good enough for him. Idk, thoughts ran threw my head as I passed him and no words were said. Images of what was truly happing entered my mind. I guess the only way to get what I want is if I do it myself. If I wait on him to catch me when I fall, i'd hit the ground. If I wait for him to come to me, i'd be waiting an eturnity. Theres no point on waiting for something thats never going to follow. I really like him, the way he gives me hugs to were his hand slowly slides off my waist or how he smiles at me with that perfect smile. The way he laughs when somethings not funny, but you laugh along too so he doesnt look retarded. The way he calls my name when all he says is hello. Everything about him seems to send shivers down my spine. But I guess that doesnt matter considering I am nothing more but a phesent in his grace. He seems to hold on to every piece of me and he doesnt even know it. I dont know what to do. I dont want to rush things b/c the last time i was to  kiss the lips of him it was fatal. and if I wait then my lips shall never kiss what is rightfully mine. Part of me wants to run to him and be with him every second i can, no holding back, giving him everything i have. Then the other side of me wants to wait and let him doso in vise-ver-sa. Im so confused about which to do. Both seem so right and yet at the same time seem so desperatly wrong. Please help me with my desicion.... I am one of those people who i guess have seem to run out of advice for myself and need some from the company of another.


Published On: 12/17/2007
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Im writing you to tell you im sorry. Im sorry that we dont spend as much time together as we used to. I've taken advantage you. I only visit you on my time, and i no longer think of you as much as i used toI think its best if u make up ur mind .. quit changing your mind ..i know your going through stuff && i really help u but i dont think u will let me thats alright i understand last night was a rough night...everything will be alright babe dont worry im here to talk if u want ..  After saying goodbye to Corey   at like 10pm   i drove home... and crawled into bed... i was so incredibly tired... but for some odd reason i just couldnt fall asleep... so after  hours of fiddling with my cell phone&& on my computer ... and past the time of ipod listening... and the painting my nails...  watching t.v. i decided that i would lay down in my bed, close my eyes and hope for the best... at first it was a little overwelming, there were so meny thoughts racing through my head. Good ones, bad ones... i had decisions to make, things to do... but after laying there for about a half hour they started to fade away... I felt like God was telling me woah anna, you need to chill out and think... now the subject that last came into my head is wayyy to confusing to talk about.. but it involves two other people besides me, so some people know what im talking about, at first when i thought about it i was really bummed out, this topic is sooo not fun... i dont want to take the easy way out, i really dont, but if thats what needs to happen it probably will... sadly enough. but you know me, how my brain wonders, and i bounce from subject to subject like mad. I came to and idea. What if, once you born, god gave a name. A name of another person, that was already born, or yet to be born. That person got your name too, and that person was the one that you were supposed to spend the rest of you life with. You grew up knowing that person, god made you compatible, you loved the same things, shared the same intrests, and you knew that they were the one... there would be no cheating, no question, there wouldnt be another girl, or "chemistry" with someone else. There wouldnt be tha best friend gone bad that wants your guy. There would be no abuse, it would be PERFECT. but the world isnt like that. right now we're in a time of trial and error. Who knows the person your dating now could be your husband, or someone just to share memories with at highschool reunions, or you may never see them again. i wish things wernt complicated, but they are. Im willing to try, to try and make it through this rough time, are you?
 
xoxo - brianne


Published On: 11/24/2007
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