My Past
I am more mature than I ever want to be
I have seen some things that no one should ever see.
I've seen death and rape and lies.
I've seen guns and beers and cries.
My best friend killed herself at my side.
More friends died in a drunken ride.
I've stared down the barrel of a gun.
I've ssen the cops and had to run.
I've been raped and torn apart
Pieces ripped from my heart.
Left to lie there in the mud
Covered up with my own blood.
I'll never forget who it was
The one boy I truely loved.
I've seen things no one should see.
But through it all, I'm still happy.
I still look forward to the next day.
To see my friends, to laugh, to play.
Everyone thinks I'm so free
Because that is how I wish to be.
I want to forget my lang hard past
And have a future that will last.
But each time I push it to the back of my mind,
It comes rushing back one more time.
Nightmares of the people dead.
Nightmares of the blood I've shed.
Nightmares of the things I've been through.
Nightmares of the things I knew.
I could have saved so many lives,
But I stood and watched them die.
All the death and rape and lies.
All the guns and beers and cries.
These memories will always last
Becuase unfortunatly, this is my past.
