Orgasatron – a tale
of life and lust in the digital wild west
“Were in deep shi*t dude” said the
clown as the universe contracted into a single point, “deepest shi*t I’ve seen
since the shi*t mines of alpha continuo”. It was the day of reckoning, the world
was there to see it and observe its wonderful shine. The clown picked up the
universal ululation array (or UUA for short) and placed it in a worn brown
plastic briefcase. “I’m sort of glad you’re around and not glad at the same
time for what it cost me.” exclaimed the clown as he turned to his unimaginable
friend. “INDEED” replied the computer voice of the clown’s only friend in the
universe, “FYI I have aids”.
Jeb
Turncoatmcbaggins woke up this morning like every morning, soaked in the
dampness of his wife’s pleasure slime. “Christ Maggie! Stop MASTERBATEING” he
shorted, even though he would be able to steal all her money cards if she ever
stopped that constant sacrament. He drove to work in the usual manner of the
future, in the sky on autopilot for free. There he transforms from Jeb local
man on the street to Doc Turncoatmcbaggins private eye and robot finding
expert. Jeb’s job is to find missing robots whose programming goes haywire.
It’s an easy enough job and the pay is shi*te. Suddenly a call shot warmly out
of the telephone machine “HELP—STOLENROBOT: NAME: Orgasatron BRAND:N/A SEX: always”. “OMFG”
shouted the doctor though the shoutish future machine, “sex bots like
Orgasatron are hard to come by if you know what I mean, I can program it to
bite off dudes cocks and bring them to me to complete my master plan to be the
cockmaster of this fair city!”. Suddenly a naked old lady
appeared on the tv, “Hi im president Lohan and I just stuck a banna up my
a**hole, you can do it to and post it on youtube if not for yourself for
America” she said. Jeb masturbated furiously and was unable to bring himself to
climax.
Then
there was a knock at the door! Jeb zipped up his space pants and nearly slipped
on his seed to reach the door open button in time. “Hello jeb, I am Bounty
Huntatron and I’m here to suck on your space popsicles” beeped-out Bounty
Huntatron as he walked to the tiny door in the wall. Bounty opened the door and
saw an even larger door on the inside of the tiny door and opened that and was
in a magical realm of popsicles. Large green popsicles inhabited most of this
carnival of frozen delight, and young German men and women come here annually
to have sex and have space orgies. The robot was wide eyed as he approached the
tower of ice angels. “thus I have been sent to the heavens!” gaily said Bounty.
Instant robot death lasers were the ice angels only reply.
Jeb
called an ancient googlemaster he knew to look up the robots location. “234
parkway east, about a block from that shop that has the 10 dollar ‘dildoe till
you drop’ bag sale.” Moaned out the chinaman.
Jeb was on his way before the phone hit the ground, he knew what this
was… war.
Jeb
easily found and deactivated the robot and brought him to his secret robot lab.
Programming him to eat cocks the robot did so for many years till it contracted
aids and was put in the hospital, I mean space robot hospital.
“yes
you have aids” said the space robot robot doctor. “dam” said Orgasatron. “yup,
not hiv, full blown aids” repeated the doctor “just to be clear”. “well how could
this happen?” whined the robotic patient. “hmm… I don’t know perhaps all the
biting off of everyone’s cocks?” chuckled the doctor. “oh yeah, the cock
biting” said the distraught robotic pork sword remover.
Kinda
bummed about the whole aid’s thing, the robot cockbiteing man walked to the
circus in an attempt to cheer himself up.
In the circus he meets an amazing clown called beebo and together they masturbate
furiously till they both reach climax! Then suddenly the cockbiteing robot man
bites his cock off and stored it in a special cock sack inside the robots
titanium hull. “this cock is special and will be inside me forever” beeped the
robot.
“noooooo,
I enjoyed putting that in my daughters cereal every morning without her knowing
and laughing as she ate it!” said the clown. The clown now neutered and unable
to produce cock soup for his little angel decides to go back to his old job in
the physics of destroying the universe lab at Harvard 2.0 and does not change
his makeup or attire to suit his new workplace environment.
“ahh
haha! I have built the UUA device!” shouted the cock-less wonder on his second
day. Then due to a slip and fall
problem, the machine gets turned on and everyone gets 10 minutes to live except
for people with clowns DNA somewhere in there body. As the universe slowly
fades away the clown can see none other than the cock eating robot walking over
the hill. Then slowly the doctor begins to kiss the robot. “Were in deep shi*t
dude” he said.
