You might be a redneck if…
*You've ever vacationed in a rest area.
*Your belt buckle is bigger than your head.
*You think paprika is a third-world country.
*You refer to the fifth grade as "my senior year".
*Your checks feature pictures of dogs fighting.
*Your muffler is held on by a coat hanger.
*Going to the bathroom in the middle of the night requires shoes and a flashlight.
*Bikers back down from your mama
*Your bicycle has a gun rack.
*After removing the empty beer cans from your car you find you get fifteen more miles to the gallon.
*Directions to your house include "turn off the paved road"
*You wet the bed and four other people immediately know it.
*You actually know what kind of leaves make the best substitute for toilet paper.
*Your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening at the oil shop.
*The neighbors have ever asked to borrow the light bulb.
*Your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.
*Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
*You hold a frog and it worries about getting warts.
*You have to take the entire day off to get your teeth cleaned.
*You offer to give somebody the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
*You ever listed fuzzy dice on an insurance claim.
*Your trolling motor used to be a fan in a barber shop.
*You list tick removal as a skill on your resume.
